big sister blog

back from another hiatus (sorry!). the holidays were full of celebrating, spending loads of money, eating lots of yummy food, and precious quality time with family and friends. now that they’re over, we’re in the midst of winter, aka a dreaded time where we’re yearning for summer, yet it feels so far out of our reach. it’s very cold and very uneventful. there’s nothing to look forward to in the near future so we’re left dreaming of hot summer days at the beach and it not being pitch black before 5pm. 

for most, this time seems like a never-ending spiral of unfortunate events- getting sick, being overworked, going stir crazy, you name it. despite all the negativity, i believe we have the power to make use of this time and enjoy it to the fullest. this can also apply to any season, literally and figuratively. 

the waiting game 

we usually associate waiting with dread and frustration, but making a tiny switch in this mindset could be a game-changer in all aspects of life. whenever you’re feeling frustrated from the waiting game, whether it’s getting a job, a relationship, a certain event, or even your friend that’s always late, simply ask yourself why. 

notice how i said why and not why me. the butterfly effect is very real and whether it’s waiting around for something you really want, or dealing with unfortunate circumstances, each of these have a critical role in how life unfolds. if it wasn’t for your friend being late, you wouldn’t have remembered to grab your purse. if it wasn’t for you being out of commission with the flu for a week, you would have never had the chance to be lazy with no expectations (from yourself or anyone else). if it wasn’t for the years of being alone, you wouldn’t have learned to love yourself. if it wasn’t for the months of being unemployed, you wouldn’t have learned the value of patience and gratitude. 

when i’m experiencing unfortunate things, my first thought is always what i’m learning from it and how i could best take advantage to become a better, stronger person. what helps me is to think about the traits that i’m lacking, and how the unfortunate situation is forcing me to strengthen them. in addition to my previous point about patience and gratitude, other examples include: empathy, discipline, consideration, boundary-setting, independence, and most of all, strength. thinking like this results in an entirely different perspective and motivates me to power through for the sake of becoming a better person. 

i also want to note the importance of always prioritizing yourself. you’re overall health should be your #1 priority, whether you’re in a relationship, have a demanding job, or waiting around for something to happen. you should always be looking for ways to improve, both physically and mentally. nothing is worth sacrificing your mental and physical health, so if any aspect of your life is negatively affecting either, it’s time to reevaluate and move onto bigger and better things. you are the only person in control, both on a large and small scale. you are the one who is in charge of making the circumstances better for yourself, rather than making excuses, thinking of other things before yourself, and being lazy. implementing small things into your lifestyle dramatically improves your quality of life and, ultimately, the opportunities available to you, which helps to achieve larger goals. so please, no matter what anyone says, be selfish and prioritize yourself and your wellbeing. do not rush this time and constantly look to the future, embrace it and be present. work on yourself in silence, do the things you’ve always wanted to do, and gravitate to where the circumstances are favorable for you, not against you. always!!! 

the little things

here, i will list out some little things that make this season worth cherishing, instead of dreading. 

1. sunlight reflecting off snow, something i’ve never cared to take notice in but has completely altered my vision of the winter from being dark and gross, to quite beautiful 
2. keeping pretty flowers around: in a strange way this reinforces my self-worth when i buy them for myself, along with the hope that spring is just around the corner 
3. taking advantage of winter fashion: from experimenting with new styles to layering and wearing cute jackets and accessories, winter is by far the best season for fashion. argue with the wall.
4. spending quality time with family & friends: staying in and doing wholesome things has been my favorite thing about this time. even though the holidays are over, you’re still able to take advantage of the down time by cherishing quality time with your loved ones (and with yourself). 
5. practicing discipline: i completed dry january for the first time and, though a small feat, am proud of myself for practicing discipline and gathering the strength to go out and have fun while doing so. 

other ideas: 

consistent workouts 

reading the bible / going to church every sunday

cooking every meal

journaling every day

6. perfecting your skincare routine: since there’s limited (visible) sun, this is your opportunity to use retinols and other harsh products to finally accomplish the glass skin you’ve been dreaming of. pro tip: use sunscreen every single day, whether you’re leaving the house or not, rain or shine. the sun is always there, and is in fact very strong when it’s reflecting off snow. it also fades dark spots 🙂 
7. trying out new things / personal styles: i took this time to experiment a little with my hair because why not? if you don’t like it, there’s plenty of time for it to grow back / change before you’re out and about this summer.  
8. new hobbies: i am a huge advocate for learning as many hobbies as you can, when you have any spare time. my new year’s resolution was to never be sitting around doing nothing and being unproductive, especially laying in bed doom-scrolling for hours. 

examples:

1. blogging
2. journaling 
3. podcasting
4. cooking
5. indoor sports 
6. running 
7. reading 
8. watching classic films (my personal favorite, i have learned more by doing this throughout my season of waiting than ever before. pro tip: putting the subtitles on is crucial if you want to truly understand the film and learn from it.) 

some of my personal favorites (that everyone should 1000% watch at least once):

the truman show

poor things

stranger than fiction

little women

interstellar

eternal sunshine of a spotless mind

lady bird

good will hunting 

dead poets society 

the notebook 

shawshank redemption

the royal tenenbaums

moonrise kingdom

he’s just not that into you 

500 days of summer

13 going on 30

how to lose a guy in 10 days 

utilize this “winter arc” to level up in every way possible, so you’re glowing from the inside out by the time summer comes around 🙂 

xoxo,

jm