big sister blog

long time no see 🙂 when i’m mia for a few weeks or even months at a time, it usually means i have absolutely nothing to write about. when something comes to me and i’m feeling inspired, i write about it right away, which is why we’re here now. 

anyways, last night one of my best friends texted me a photo of a list of “22 reflections from year 22” that his wine drunk brain thought of just hours before his 23rd birthday. my immediate thought, admittedly, was that it was corny, but after reading it, i actually really resonated with it and became inspired to write another bsb post 🙂 

the list ranged from basic cliches to niche, personal reflections from the year. either way, i do think it’s a valuable exercise for everyone to do the night before their birthday every year, no matter what age. plus, it’ll always be fun to save and read the previous years’ to see what has changed. 

let’s get to the point now, shall we? the reflection that resonated with me the most was one that read “only associate yourself with funny people.” yup, that’s right, just what the title said. not clickbait that turned into some crazy motivational mantra that sounds good on paper. only associate yourself with funny people. my friend called me on facetime and made me read his list aloud so that he could see my reactions live in real time, which, without his knowledge, made each reflection’s affect on me much more prominent. so when i read this one specifically, a montage of memories with my loved ones and i hysterically laughing came to mind and a strong feeling of warmth and tenderness took over my body. and all I said responded at the moment was “wowwwww, i really love this one!” 

funny people make you laugh. and genuine laughter cures all, even the worst emotions: grief that feels like you’ll be stuck in it forever, depression that makes you physically ill, anxiety that is suffocating, sadness that leaves you in despair. and when you’re happy, laughing forces you to stop and take a moment to really appreciate the exact moment you’re in, appreciate life as a whole a little more. 

notice how i said genuine laughter. i argue that the feeling of ingenuine laughter is most definitely up there in the list of worst feelings. that being said, my friend was right, you must surround yourself with funny people who make you laugh – genuinely – if you want to live a happy and fulfilled life. 

the concept of being funny is fairly subjective – everyone has a different sense of humor and some people even have multiple, but every individual has the right to their own and that’s okay. but if you’re considering a personal relationship with someone, whether that be a friendship or a romance, and your senses of humor do not align, i’m afraid it’s just not going to work out. as ironic as it is, humor should be taken more seriously when evaluating any kind of relationship, and if someone doesn’t align with yours, take it as a sign that it most likely will not work out instead of looking past it and wasting time trying to “focus on the positives.” and if they have no sense of humor, well good luck charlie. whenever you’re doubting any relationship in life, just begin to take notice how much you laugh around that person, how funny are. that, of course with common human decency and emotional intelligence, should be your sign whether or not to take action.

taking note of one’s sense of humor sometimes takes time, and that’s okay too. some people are funny only through certain channels (like through text vs. irl) and some people are just naturally funny. some people, like me, are tough to crack and therefore you sometimes don’t get their full sense of humor from the first few interactions. but like i said, it’s very subjective and at the end of the day it’s all up to your own personal sense of humor.

also, personal relationship or not, i do believe that someone’s sense of humor defines their intelligence and personality in a significant way. though personal relationships obviously matter more to us, every single person we encounter is for a reason, therefore, in order to make the most out of every interaction, its important to take notice of everyone’s sense of humor. lacking a sense of humor, in my humble opinion, is a big, fat red flag and if that can be realized in the early stages of meeting someone and you’re able to take precautions ahead of time, you will probably dodge many, many bullets in all aspects of life. but if you assess that someone’s humor is similar to yours and you’re able to integrate it into conversations, your chances of unlocking many more, new opportunities greatly increases.

i feel so lucky to be surrounded by friends and family who quite literally make me laugh 24/7. i’ve always taken the characteristic of being funny very seriously, but never reflected on it in-depth like my friend did in his list. it made me realize how important it is to cherish the people in my life who do make me genuinely laugh and to be focus on being present in the times where i am laughing with them. will be taking mental notes of anyone who i need to force a fake laugh around, walk on eggshells with when making jokes, or don’t laugh at all around from here on out ❤ 

xoxo,

jm