big sister blog

this is probably the most vulnerable and unfiltered as it will get on bsb so feel free to stay along for the ride 🙂 

i’ve gotten to a point where i truly didn’t think i’d ever get to, which is the one where i am unemployed for more than two months after post-grad. that seems dramatic, but for someone who has always been as go-go-go as i have, the plan was to sell myself to the corporate world immediately after i graduated, and with my resume and work ethic, i didn’t think i’d have an issue with doing so. i also figured, nothing wrong with gettin’ right into it and making money for myself right? 

well, things didn’t go exacttttly as i planned. let’s just say a few things slipped through the cracks. but, as always, i knew it was for a reason. God has his funny way of doing stuff. this time, i believe He knew i needed this time to finally focus on myself- wholeheartedly. to dedicate this summer to truly being a “kid” for the last time with my best friends who will soon all go their separate ways :,( 

these two months have been the first in a very long time that i’ve had absolutely no responsibilities other than job searching. i’ve had summer jobs since i was 14-years-old and have even worked during the school year sometimes, as well. so, it’s definitely been extremely relaxing and i’m very grateful for it, but there’s been lots of times like these where i’ve become pretty anxious that i’m not doing what i should be doing. that i’m behind and should be doing more. i know what you’re thinking, everyone deals with this and i still have lots of time to find a job and work for the rest of my life. i know that. it’s just the feeling of being behind and stuck in the same spot is one that is unfamiliar and… really sucks. 

don’t get me wrong, i’ve tried everything in my power to stay away from entering a negative mindset and remain positive, as it’s still pretty early in the whole process, i’m still young, i have an incredible support system, and i’ve taken this time to do other valuable things that i probably won’t be able to do as much once i start working. here’s a list of things i’ve mustered up in these long 2+ months that might be able to help some of you, since i know this is a common thing to deal with 🙂 

1. stay active – hot girl walks every day, (i’ve always wanted to become a runner and didn’t think i was capable, but now am up to running 2 miles without stopping and have a goal of running a half marathon in the future!) 
2. play sports – old sports that give you nostalgia, pickleball (you know you wanna try it, just do it!), swim laps in your pool ??
3. practice / learn a language on duolingo – it’s super fun, addicting, and easy to do in your free time 
4. journal your thoughts – again, i always find that this helps in times that i feel myself get worked up 
5. make new playlists – this is something so niche but i love doing while i’m bored on the treadmill or sitting around (my sunset playlist is my all-time favvvv) 
6. become a book worm – find books that you genuinely enjoy reading and it’ll become fun for you! reading makes you unknowingly learn so much, while making time go by super quickly (i have a list on my amazon storefront of the ones i’ve loved recently) 
7. teach yourself to cook – this is so helpful in terms of adulting!!! find fun recipes on tiktok, run to the grocery store (which is therapeutic in itself), and practice cheffing up for you and your fam (they’ll appreciate it whether it’s good or bad, trust) 
8. clean the house / your room – whether it’s just reorganizing, cleaning our drawers or your closer, or tidying up, it’s always good for your mental health to have a clean space ❤ 
9. and most obviously, look for jobs, perfect your linkedin profile, resume, cover letter, etc. 🙂 research articles to do so and always be finding new ways to grow and be better in order to find the job that will make you the most happy!!! 

anyways, they weren’t kidding when they said that this can be a pretty difficult time. it’s been bittersweet for sure, which i could have predicted. but i would have never predicted it was going to be this hard. on top of the job search, which is already very repetitive, i’ve also been dealing with the post-grad dating scene, which has also been very repetitive, and of course, frustrating af. i’ve come to the conclusion that the two are too similar and therefore cannot be focused on at the same time. if i’m gonna focus on myself during this time, the dating scene is going to have to hold off for just a little longer until i have a handle on my career. because just like the job search, you spend all this time into one “thing” just to be strung along and either 1.) ghosted or 2.) left in the dust for some lame reason. so, in order to not go absolutely insane, i’ve decided to invest all of my time and energy on the one that’s more valuable for now, the job search. 

p.s. if anyone has any tips with how to deal with any of this, i’m allll ears. always happy to take another big sister’s advice, because lets face it, no one’s perfect.

xoxo, 

jm