big sister blog

here to help you stay hot while being low-maintenance in college

it’s very easy to get caught up in comparing yourself to others while at school. an idea as stupid as “most of the girls are blonde here, so i have to be blonde” led to me highlighting my hair blonde. i hated it, but everyone around me seemed to love it, so i kept it. i saw how other girls did their makeup and tried to mimic it, knowing it didn’t look the same on me but continuing to do it anyway just so i “fit in.” let me just tell you now: horrible way to navigate college. stick to what you know and what suits you best and it will take you farther than you ever imagined.

i’ve always been a high maintenance girl, but when entering college, i also entered a new level of constant upkeep. i was spending hundreds of dollars each month to look my best 24/7. i did not let a day go by without having tanned skin, fake nails done, long eyelash extensions, clean eyebrows, and perfect hair, all in addition to constantly buying trendy outfits. of course, this all took a huge toll not only on my wallet, but on my mental health.

i’m not sure if it’s because i’m getting older, or because i became truly exhausted, but one random day the summer going into my junior year, i came to the realization that i don’t need to keep doing all of this. it was never about making myself happy, but rather comparing myself to others and making everyone else around me happy. so, i dyed my chunky highlighted hair back to my dark brown roots, took my eyelash extensions out for good, let my natural nails go bare, and cancelled the tanning membership.

when i look back on photos of myself during my first two years of college, i genuinely am concerned that i went out in public the way i did. with long eyelash extensions that looked absurdly unnatural, dark eyeshadow going up to my eyebrows, thick liquid eyeliner, a dark orange tan, and cakey makeup. self-awareness is key, right? and let me make clear, these awkward phases definitely lead to the best character development. but seriously, it was awful.

it took awhile for me to adjust, but after a few weeks, i got used to ~embracing my natural beauty~ don’t get me wrong, i still get tempted to go back to my old ways (i dyed my hair blonde impulsively for senior year but quickly went back to brown). and i do book appointments for special occasions, but it makes them much more special and exciting. not to mention, i get loads of complements whenever i do go now. 

this revelation also led to a boost in confidence. it’s like i’ve been wearing a mask for all this time, so finally being able to walk outside without that one has been a huge relief. i never did the math, but i now constantly have money saved in my bank account that is used for much more important things at school. rather than constantly asking my parents for money, i save up money from work that would never remain there if i kept up with my high maintenance lifestyle. 

instead of temporary solutions, i have been practicing a more effective, low-maintenance lifestyle that enhances my natural features from within, so that it benefits me in the long-run. whether that is by simple things, like perfecting my skincare routine or using a hair mask once a week, or focusing on internal wellness by taking vitamins, working out, and increasing water intake, focusing on glowing from within is he best way to glow from the outside. if you told me i’d be writing about this a year ago, i would have probably laughed in your face, but making all of these things a routine has truly been the best thing for my overall health and i have never felt better. i’m not saying to never get a manicure or a fresh blowout, but no one should ever feel that they can never show the world their true self. it’s tiring to constantly be in a mindset that tries to please everyone else and the truth is, those who are really meant to be in your life will be the ones who appreciate that true self. also, less really is more. i’ve found that with less eye makeup, fake tan, and eyelash extensions, i actually look much better, and people around me notice, as well. and pro tip: if a boy tells you that you look better with your highlighted hair (there’s been a lot of those), he ain’t the one!